Who Is Really in Need?
Yesterday we looked at our responsibility to our own relatives. What about the church family? There are those in need there too, and we have a responsibility to care for them. Paul says it a number of times: "Give proper recognition to those widows who are really in need… The widow who is really in need and left all alone puts her hope in God and continues night and day to pray and to ask God for help" (1 Timothy 5:3, 5).
Why Widows Were So Vulnerable
In those days widows were among the most vulnerable people in society. Women had little to no property rights, little to no access to jobs, and no state support. They were very much dependent on men for their financial well-being, and it would have been unlikely that the man of the house had investments and long-term savings of the kind that are more common today.
To be widowed then meant you were likely to become destitute, unless you married your late husband's brother. Perhaps you remember the occasion in the gospels when some people tried to trick Jesus with a story of a woman whose husbands kept dying and she kept marrying the next brother, and the next. Widows who didn't marry again could find themselves in a very bad situation indeed.
Paul wanted to make sure that it was the truly needy widows who received help. The ones who actually were left destitute.
Helping Without Creating Dependency
We have to make a similar distinction in church today. We've been caught, at my church, by people who seem to be needy but are actually confidence-tricksters.
One of our ministries provides food, clothing and toiletries for those in our community who are really in need. One of the key ideas behind it is to prevent dependency. We don't want people getting comfortable receiving help from us, to the point where they stop looking for work or stop trying to care for themselves. We have a system, then, where those in need apply for help, and we work through their situation with them and prayerfully consider how best to help.
Those who are really in need are happy to work through the system. The chancers usually don't want to jump through the hoops.
Carrying the Load Yourself
Paul adds this: "If any woman who is a believer has widows in her care, she should continue to help them and not let the church be burdened with them, so that the church can help those widows who are really in need" (1 Timothy 5:16).
The church helps those who are genuinely in need, and Paul believes the people of the church can also help where they can, so that the church doesn't become over-burdened. I am grateful for the people in our community who are compassionate and kind and quick to help. They carry a load themselves, and that frees the church to reach those who have nobody at all.
Prayerfully discern, friends, which needy people you can help yourself and which ones to direct to the church's system. Ask God to show you the difference, because He sees it clearly even when we don't.
We have a responsibility to care for the needy in our church families, and we must not neglect it.
The church family has a claim on you too, and Paul wants our help to reach the people who are genuinely desperate. Ask God this week to show you one person in need you can help yourself, rather than leaving it to someone else.